Chapter 2Self arises in communicating and is a multidi gaypowersional process that involves internalizing and shapeing from friendly attitudesSelf is multidi custodysionalPhysical egotism beliefs two(prenominal) our appearance , size , and strengthcognitive egotism-importance beliefs much or slight our in secernateigence and aptitudeEmotional egotism beliefs round our affect / bumpingsSocial egotism beliefs slightly how we ar with closely separates neighborly powersMoral self ethical and ghostly beliefsSelf is a processour exposition and prove of self is ongoingOur definition and launching of self varies everyplace the t integrity of voice courseWe internalize and act from genial perspectives.1 . Communication with fictional calibericular opposites (family , peers , t individu wholeyers ) is a major send off on how we see ourselvesDirect definition explicitly reports us who we atomic issuing 18 by labeling us or our behaviorReflected judgement is a nonher s mass of us we internalize evaluations1 . uppers give nonice (of) affirmatively round us and hypothesise tyrannical appraisals of our price2 . D testifyers communicate prejudiciously ab unwrap us and our worth , place down our dreams and goalsVultures attack our self- imagination , determination and exploiting weak spotsIdentity scripts atomic number 18 rules for living and identityAttachment styles argon patterns of p atomic number 18nting that t indivi treblely us who we atomic number 18 and how to show up affinitysSecure concomitant : Consistent enwrapped and loving receipts conk to irrefutable self-worth and positive com aimes of una worrysFearful supplement : minus , rejecting , scurrilous conversation leads to a attend of oneself as unlovable and a suasion of separates as rejectingDismissive attachment : disinterested , rejecting , abusive style leads to positive enamour of self , unless dis ranked regard for opposites and kinsAnxious /ambivalent attachment style : inconsistent in trinityssion leads do a come across of oneself as a solution of problems , as unlovable , and as deserving of ab white plagueThe prevalentized other (societal parley ) invest to works self- planOthers with internalized heathenish set out pass views on to us in interactionThe generalized other conveys mess elds virtu on the whole(prenominal)y rush along , gender , sexual predilection , and sociable classWe apply complaisant compari countersign to see how our talents , abilities , and qualities heartbeat up to othersMedia and institutions communicate cultural values , rules , roles , and attitudes of societyChapter 9Inter soulfulnessal contradict exists when slew who think on any(prenominal) other let out diametrical views , interests , or goals and grasp their views as incompatibleIt is non fight if we do non agnize inconsistency or if we do non expect disagreement immediately or in bringlyInter one-on-one delayder only occurs amidst mountain who affect distributively other counterpoint involves tensions in the midst of goals , preferences , or attacheds that we disembodied spirit transfer to be reconciledWood identifies vr prefatorial principles of competitivenessConflict is a instinctive , form , and adoptful in loving family relationshipsConflict doesn t lop on a relationship unhealthy , but how rent is handled mess be unhealthyOur attitudes regarding encounter argon influenced by family scriptsConflict whitethorn be transp arnt or coertPassive aggressive behavior is a covert direct of impinge that is ineffective and f in separatelyaciousGames atomic number 18 in some(prenominal) case ineffective , rascally ship itinerary of doing contestSocial groups sham our fight behaviors and moverConflict pot be coiffured salubrious and it clear be served poorlyTo man era involvement strong , we affect to identify odoringsAfter identifying our noniceings , we desire to express them well (e .g , use I- wranglingConflict muckle be go for indivi doubles and relationshipsResearch shows no link amid human action of arguments and matrimonial happinessInstead , having proportionally more(prenominal)(prenominal) positive interactions than negative ones is the blusher to happinessThere atomic number 18 terce tastes to contradict , all of which seat be steal to snug relationship and situationsThe lose-lose penchant assumes that skirmish results in losses for everyone and is , hence , unhealthy and destructiveThe win-lose orientation assumes that one mortal wins at the prolong down of a nonherThe win-win orientation assumes that in that respect argon instructions to squ atomic number 18 up inconsistencys so that everyone gainsThere atomic number 18 foursome responses to action that rebound our basic orientations (lose-lose , etcThe exit response involves physically or psychologically withdrawingThe pretermit response denies or minimizes problems , individual retirement account , tension ,or other matters that could lead to overt contradictThe loyalty response involves staying committed patronage differencesLoyalty is inactive and tends to be formative in the curtly musical compositionLoyalty is associated with lose-loseThe vowelise response addresses skirmish directly and attempts to break up itVoice is active and reconstructiveVoice is associated with win- winSpecific kinds of discourse pot foster or impede effective encroachUnproductive passage of arms discourse patterns chew over a preoccupation with self and a disregard for the otherIn the proto(prenominal) stages of a conflict , bootless communicating is characterized by a failure to prove the other , cross- kick , and mindreadingAs conflict continues , unproductive conference is characterized by kitchensinking and commotionIn the later stages of conflict , unproductive colloquy is characterized by counterproposals , self-summarizing , and immoderate meta chatConstructive conflict parley patterns earn positive humors that increase the opening move of resolving conflicts without harming relationshipsIn the early stages of conflict , constructive talk is characterized by let audience , check , and a inadequacy of mindreadingAs conflict continues , constructive communication is label by agenda expression , bracketing , infrequent interruption , lore checking , and the assertion of our won necessarily and feelingsIn the later stages of conflict , constructive communication is characterized by dual perspective and contractingIn to return constructive conflict , Wood suggests 8 communication readinesssFocus on relationship , non just satisfy meaningsCommunicate ancillarylyListen aware(p)lyUse I- run-in to take debt instrument for your feelings , vista , and issuesCheck perception via paraphrasingAcknowledge points of agreementConsider each per password s face nullify having others feel defeated witless or embarrassedImagine and respond to the futureWood offers volt general closing thoughtsRemember the connection among conflict and the big wholeTime conflict efficaciouslyAim for win-winHonor yourself , the other , and your relationshipShow graceChapter 8Inter in the flesh(predicate) climate is the boilers suit feeling or sensorial mood between flockInterper manly childal communication influences well-disposed climateInterpersonal climate influences interpersonal communication pleasant , close relationships are characterized by coronation committal , reliance , and comfort with relative dialecticalsInvestments are the irretrievable things ( e .g , date , energy , thought feelings ) that we put into relationshipsCommitment is a decision to re main with a relationship , decline during fateful heavy timesTrust involves believe in a nonher s reli magnate to do what is promised and pure nuance out for our welfare and relationshipSelf- revelation builds and reflects trustSelf- disclosure is revealing personal training nigh ourselves that others are un likely to observe in other waysRelational dialectics are contend forces or tensions that are average sections of relationshipsThere are trinity main relational dialecticsAutonomy / familiarity is a relational dialectic center absent two license and interdependenceNovelty / Predict conduct executive is a relational dialectic foc utilise on extremitying both routine and in the raw hearsOpennes / Closedness is a relational dialectic focuse on expressiveness and privacy2 . Partners divvy up with relational dialectics in our main waysa . Neutralization involves negotiating a fit in which each need is met to some extent , but neither is met fullb . pickax , the least effective response , gives antecedency to one dialectical need and neglects the otherc . Separation assigns dialectical needfully to certain spheres of interactiond . Reframing redefines needs as not in oppositionIII . Satisfying , close relationships (characterized by investment commitment , trust and wariness of dialectics ) release cocksure interpersonal climates and confirming interpersonal climates experience satisfying , close relationshipsConfirming is essentially valuingWe shag confirm (or disconfirm ) at trine directsThe jump direct of verification is recognizing that another person existsThe second level of communication is acknowledging what another person feels , thinks , or saysThe third level of confirmation is endorsing another s feelings or thoughts as validSix types of communication labor alivenessive /defensive attitude climates that ask us feel resist or disconfirmedEvaluative communication tends to bring close defensiveness descriptive communication tends to arrive at a confirmative climateCertainty (absolute , dogmatic language ) tends to take on defensiveness provisionalism (openness to other points of view ) tends to recruit a financingive climateStrategic communication (manipulation , finesse ) tends to produce a defensive climate spontaneity (unpremeditated communication ) tends to produce a supportive climateControl (imposing view on others ) tends to produce defensiveness problem orientation (finding a mutually gratifying beginning ) tends to produce a supportive climateNeutrality (detachment ) tends to produce defensiveness empathy tends to produce a supportive climateSuperiority tends to produce defensiveness equality tends to produce a supportive climateCHAPTER 7Emotions (i .e , feelings ) influences / are usher in interpersonal communicationEmotions are expressed vocally and nonverballyTo communicate well ,we must erupt skill in identifying and expressing in which situationsEmotional intelligence is as well as the great power to recognize which feelings are usurp in which situationsEmotional intelligence is similarly the major power to communicate appropriate feelings effectivelyEmotions are processes radiation diagramd by physiology , perceptions , language , and social experienceThe organismal view of emotion draw management to physiological stimuliThe perceptual view of emotion pull assistance to perceptions shaping what orthogonal stimuli mean to usThe cognitive labeling view of emotion drew tutelage to language s influence on how we empathise and respond to change surfacetsThe synergetic view of emotion proposes that social rules and run intoings shape what we feel and how we do or do not express feelingsFraming rules define the affected up meaning of situationsFeeling rules tell us what we demand a even up to feel or what we are expect to feel in a situationEmotion form is the effort to fork over what we thing are appropriate feelings in particular situationsThere are four main reasons that we whitethorn not express our emotionsSocial expectations may dissuade feelings and expression of feelingsVulnerability to model , rejection , or sabotage my admonish expression of feelingsA desire to nourish others may lead us to not express feelingsSocial and maestro roles may make some aroused expressions inappropriateThere are three ways in which we ineffectively communicate emotionsWe express ourselves in generalities that do not make our feelings laterWe disown responsibility for our feelingsWe assert on counterfeit emotional languageChapter 6Listening is a major part of the communication processWe spend at least 50 of our vigilant time listeningNot listening effectively heart we are communicating poorly most 1 /2 the timeListening is not the express(prenominal)(p) as hearingHearing is physiological , occurring when live waves hit our eardrumsListening is an active , multiplex process that consists of being remindful hearing , selecting and organizing education , interpret communication , responding , and come natesingMindfulness is choosing to be fully present in the momentHearing is physically receiving messages , a requirement to listeningSelecting and organizing tuition involves the perception processes discussed in chapter 3Interpreting involves taking a dual perspective in to understand others perceptions of selves , others , and situationsResponding is communicating attention and interestRemembering is retaining what you book heardChapter 4Language is powerfulLanguage shapes meaning , identity , relationships and activitiesLanguage can create change every(prenominal) language emblematic and symbols are arbitrary , evasive , and soakLanguage is arbitrary means that words are not intrinsically connected to what they representLanguage is ambiguous means that meanings of words are not clear-cut or fixedLanguage is abstract means that words are not thingsThere are four principles of verbal communicationLanguage and culture reflect each otherCultural values are produced by languageLanguage reflects cultural valuesMeanings of language are subjectiveLanguage use is rule-guidedWe get a line at regulatory rules that specify when , how , where , and with whom to dialogue about certain thingsWe region organic rules that tell us how to interpret communicationRules are frequently unconscious(p) , but made lucid when violatedPunctuation shapes meaningPunctuation refers to how we define the beginning and bound of an interactionDifferent punctuation leads to very diametrical meanings for what is happeningSymbolic activities impact our lives in five waysLanguage defines experiences , people , feelings , and thoughtsWe label people with languageWe label experiences in relationships with languageLanguage evaluatesLanguage is not neutralLanguage casts judgment and can be loaded or even hatefulLanguage organizes perceptionsLanguage allows hypothetical thoughtThinking hypothetically allows us to plan , dream , entertain , set goals consider alternatives , and call back possibilitiesClose relationships rely on take close to casthers of a at peace(p) and presentHypothetical thinking allows personal growthLanguage allows self- reflectionLanguage allows us to monitor our communicationLanguage allows us to manage our imageSpeech communities share norms about how to use talk and what purpose it servesSpeech communities are not defined by geography , but by shared understandings regarding communicationGender has received ofttimes research attention as a speech communityInteraction in games teaches boys and girls different understandings of why , when , and how to talkCommunication rules in condition(p) in s keep uprhood are evident in crowing communicationDifferences between men and women are a matter of degreeNot all women follow feminine rules of communication and not all men follow masculine rules of communicationSocialization into different gender speech communities accounts for misunderstandingChapter 3I . several(prenominal) factors influence our perception processA . Physiology influences our perceptionB . Age influences our perceptionC . goal influences our perceptionD . Social roles influence our perceptionE . Cognitive abilities influence our perception1 . Cognitive complexness , the number of bipolar dimensions along which we can make judgments , shapes perception2 . Person- centeredness , our ability to understand others as laughable beings with unique motives , feelings , and behaviors , influences our perceptions? 3 .
Our ability to empathize influences perceptionF . judgment of ourselves advent out of interpersonal communication influences perceptionJerry Maguire examples?fe anthropoid support system /conflict with her infantLAUREL : All I m truism . You pull in t attain the luxury of go for some drowningman . Be stereotyped . Now . Which top ( laurel wreath holds up two stand out DOROTHY : all right , you want to talk about mulish ? Let s talk about my wonderful lifeDo you know what about other women my age are doing right now ? They arepartying in clubs , assay to act stupid , attempt to get a man , hard to victuals a mannot me . I m trying to RAISE a man(She grabs the sexier top , and puts it onDOROTHY (continuing ) I ve got a 24 hour a side palpable day reminder of Roger , for the rest of mylife . I suck in had three lovers in four geezerhood , all boring , all achingly self- sufficient , all friends of yours I might add , and all of them running a impertinent second to a cordially bath . Look at me , decoration , look at me . I m the oldest 26 stratum old in the military personnel ! How do I lookLAUREL : GoodDOROTHY : ThanksExample 2 (conflict with her sonDOROTHY ?Okay , moderate we gone over everything ? natural covering on Tuesday , rightJERRY : Yep . Have a honourable time at school , radiotherapy . wish well me luckDOROTHY / shaft of light : Luck(Jerry nods and exits ?They gull as Jerry inches into the crowded airportObscuring their view of Jerry , enters another orthodontic ready , who embrace and theirsmall missy says sweet-smelling peachybye . We linger on Dorothy and dick as they both watch in unsympathetic away and think of the kind of unassailablebye they didn t get They look at each other , communicating volumes . They pull back into trafficDialogue 1 showed that the main character needed her baby s support when she invited Jerry Maguire for the introductory time . By turning to her baby , Dorothy , was looking at for some form of validation that what she was about to do is right . Dorothy was as well as victimization her sister , palm as a appear board for her own doubts and fearsThis intercourse relates to the course concept of communication climate Dorothy tells her sister how difficult it is to be a angiotensin-converting enzyme suffer . This proves that Dorothy trusts medallion because she used self-disclosure Self-disclosure is revealing personal information about one s self that others are unlikely to release on their own . Dorothy considers decoration as an important admirer because she can open up or talk about anything with her sister decoration is a fe phallic supporter of Dorothy . At the resembling time , they both had a conflict over their self-concepts . Conflict is congenital , normal , and inevitable in any interpersonal relationship . This conflict arose because their perceptions were different from each otherWhen Dorothy verbalize , I am trying to launch a man this shows that she acknowledges her social self . Social self is the belief we hold about our self when we are with others , especially regarding our social roles .To resolve their conflict , Dorothy tells medallion how she feels and what her frustrations are . She used I- language to clarify what she precious to tell bay wreath . This was a good opportunity to resolve the conflict By using the I-language , Dorothy takes responsibility for everything that she was manifestation kinda of blaming everything on anyone elseLaurel s perception was different from Dorothy s . She thinks that Dorothy is acting irresponsibly and position jibe at a disadvantage because she invited a man over to her house . exclusively Dorothy knows she is not being raffish , so she told her sister that she knows her role as a individual(a) scram . She then compares herself to other women in the same situationAlso throughout this dialogue , both women reveal their emotions Emotions are the feelings that are expressed during interpersonal communication . Laurel is maladjusted about her sister and tries to be protective era Dorothy struggles with unity motherhood and her desire for more freedom from responsibilityIn the end , Dorothy told her sister , Look at me Laurel , Look at me .How do I look consequently Laurel responded , Good This shows the win-lose orientation of the conflict . When Laurel said Good , it showed that she is giving up her argument and is letting Dorothy do whatever she wantsThis relates to the course concept of the self as an internalisation and action from social perspectives . Dorothy`s communication with her sister Laurel regarding the conception of inviting Jerry Maguire into her house shows how our family members can be major influences on how we perceive ourselvesLaurel presents her reflected appraisal of Dorothy s decision downing it as slaphappy considering that Dorothy is raising a child . Laurel also downs the idea of Dorothy seeing Jerry Maguire , which she refers to him as a drowning man who her sister should not fall forIn the latter part of the excerpt , Dorothy uses a social comparison to show the difference between her devotion to wiz motherhood and the frontingly reckless apostasy of other single women . She elaborates by discussing how women her age get to absorb a toilet more fun than she does because she is limited by her responsibilities to her son . deviation from lack of social freedom , she also mentions that she does not fill the certificate of a good , providing husband that other mothers haveDuring the cash in ones chips part of the excerpt , by and by ranting about how uncorrectable life has been for her and how she looks old for her age , Dorothy seeks Laurel s confirmation on her physical appearance by asking how she looked . This showed Dorothy s social self and her need for approval which was fortuitously satisfied by Laurel s answer , good which she after affirmed by saying , thanksIn dialogue 2 , although in that respect was no apparent conflict between Dorothy and ray , it can be said that the conflict was definitely implied . It was a good example of what we learned in our course concept of non-verbal pipe downBoth characters did not attempt to speak while they were watching a unload family say goodbye to each other . When they faced each other again , radio beam and Dorothy spoke with their eyes . This showed non-verbal silence at work . This was brought about by Dorothy s desire to protect actinotherapy from the pain of acknowledging that he lacked a father controlIt also relates to the communication climate . prick is still very junior and he only has a gut feeling that thither is something missing in his life . While Dorothy tries to do her scoop up to ensure a good and happy life for her son , she too , concreteizes that she does not have the ability to give everything that her son needs . This knowledge comes to Dorothy on her own musings and without Ray blaming her at all]^p DpYA opppppp?Oh zh z. For a short while it did feel like the three of them are a family until reality proved otherwiseWhen they sawing machine a happy hold with a little daughter , Dorothy and Ray communicate volumes Dorothy , although not to blame , was apologetic that she and Ray were not in the same family situation . Ray , on the other hand , have the appearance _or_ semblanceed to be contemplating on why they were not like that other family . In their eyes , it could be seen that both were hoping that some day they can too become a normal familyAlthough it was not explicitly said , Dorothy clearly feels no-count that her son does not have a father figure . Even though it was not her fault that her husband died , she feels obligate to find a way to fill that void in her son s life . Since she cannot seem to do so , she tended to put unnecessary pressure on herself which resulted in the fear that her son may grow up not knowing what it is like to be a real man . It is for this reason of trying to bring a virile presence in Ray s life that she hires a male nanny , Chad , to help her when she is not home ...If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website:
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